Dealing With Congregation-Envy

I remember several years ago having a conversation with a youth pastor when I was helping out in his youth ministry. The church was in a very rural setting and had a van that would go out each week to pick kids up for youth group. Most of the kids who came to youth group came from very broken homes and were the victims of poverty. These kids were not stable, and trying to keep control during youth group was often a struggle. During this conversation, we talked about how we wished we could have a youth group like other churches in the city, where the majority of kids who showed up came from strong, Christian homes. Those youth groups had kids heavily involved in Bible Quiz, mission trips, small groups, etc. Things were happening in those other youth ministries! Those kids had it together, and as a result a more vibrant youth ministry was possible in their settings. In our setting, just getting kids to show up w/out body odor and to keep quiet for five minutes would literally have been a divine miracle. We had a feeling that this was going nowhere, because we didn’t have those solid, Christian youth in the group.

I remember thinking during that conversation that perhaps we are doing more “real” ministry than the other churches. I may have even vocalized this–I can’t remember. The reason I’m not sure is because at that time part of me questioned the validity of that statement. If you were to compare our youth ministry with a more “normal” youth ministry, it would be hard to say we were doing more ministry. After all, even though you could argue that the other youth groups may not have much transformation with all the glit-and-glam, what transformation could we see in our own group?

If you look at those churches who are “successful” today, most of them have an arsenal of middle-aged, middle-class Christian families who have a pretty stable life. These families can contribute healthily to the ministry not only financially, but also as volunteers. They are committed to the church’s cause, and the pastor can rely heavily on them to help carry out the mission/vision/agenda of the church. They make for great greeters, great members of a worship team, great leaders of various ministries. They are well-educated and can be trusted to take on great responsibilities.

But what if you have a church full of people who are dealing with significant family, financial, and personal issues? You can easily feel like you are limited in your capabilities to offer ministries, because you are not sure if the people coming can take on such leadership roles. These people are unable to give much financially as well, which makes it nearly impossible to start up another ministry (because of the cost of curriculum, advertising, equipment, or anything else needed to start the ministry up). Pastors of such congregations can look to congregations of neighboring churches and wish they could just have just a few of those good, solid Christian families that fill their fellow-pastors’ pews.

That’s one of the benefits of starting a new church, in my opinion. Usually, the launch teams of such church plants are very carefully formed, and those who commit are usually high-caliber individuals and families who are very capable of really investing.

What’s a pastor to do if he doesn’t have a good group of people like that in his church? What if the majority of them are broken, hurting, and unable to contribute much because of their education, family life, and/or personal struggles? Realistically, his church isn’t going to have all the ministries and outreach that other churches are able to pull off.

With all of the emphasis today on reaching out to our communities, it will be hard for this pastor, because he will quickly realize that a large amount of time, energy, and ministry will need to be put into those already coming to church vs. those who are still outside. While other churches are reaching out to their communities with all sorts of ministries and programs, this church will struggle with much more basic issues.

It would be easy for those other churches to look down on such a church and think that they have little hope of accomplishing anything significant. It would also be easy for the pastor of such a church to feel exactly the same thing.

Yet I would like to turn this thought on its head. What kind of congregation did Jesus have? His followers were largely broken, hurting people. And He said that He came precisely for those who were sick, not those who were well. And who did Jesus have in leadership to help him out? These weren’t the most intelligent or spiritually mature. They constantly struggled to understand Jesus’ mission. I think Jesus can relate to those who pastor such congregations. And I think He would very much approve of those willing to take on and shepherd insignificant people who seem to have very little to contribute.

Enter the Holy Spirit. He specializes in supernatural empowerment. It’s easy to see how stable families can help a church grow. But if you aren’t “lucky” enough to have those kinds of people–do you believe in the power of the Holy Spirit? Do you believe He can take a Simon and make him a Peter? Or take a tax collector and make him an apostle? Or a fisherman and make him a missionary?

I don’t think the process will be easy or quick. A look at the apostles shows that it isn’t easy sailing. In the end, Jesus didn’t end up with a large, successful ministry. In the end, it was back to the twelve–actually eleven. He left this earth with very little to show for the three years He spent investing in those guys. I think if you or I were around back then to evaluate Jesus’ effectiveness, we would give Him low ratings. Yet those twelve went on to make a huge difference in their own lives and ministries after scattering from Jesus’ ministry.

I think the root problem to this “congregation-envy” is that we want easily-quantifiable results–to be able to point to ministries, salvations, etc and say that we are doing something worthwhile for God. Is it always that easy to see? What if you invest your life into people and never see quantifiable results? What if the results aren’t manifested on earth until after you die? Or what if they aren’t even ever manifested on earth, but only revealed in heaven? Can you be OK with that? What if the only person who says, “Well done” to you is the Son of God when you enter into His kingdom? Wouldn’t a hug from Jesus along with those words be worth everything? And all this other stuff–is it worth ANYTHING compared with that?

Pastors, what if the people in your church knew you wish you could trade some of them for “higher-quality” people? Could you look those people in the eyes and tell them that? So stop seeing them that way! Instead, look at them with the eyes and love of Jesus. He died for him. He died for her. He loves him/her so much that He sent you to care for them. Care for them as Jesus would. Don’t see people as builders of your ministry–in time they may become builders for Christ, but it may be in a completely different context than your ministry. Can you be willing to prepare them for that role?

I think of the people in my own congregations. I am very appreciative that there are a few families who are in a place to help our church invest in our community. It is indeed a huge blessing they are here. Without them, it would be so much more difficult. We all need people who can support us. There are so many others, however, who are dealing with large issues in their lives and realistically can’t be as supportive. It is easy for me to value one more than the other, but I can’t look in their eyes and do that. And I can’t look into Jesus’ eyes and do that either.

Yeah, on my worst days I can look at other congregations and wish my congregation was more like theirs, but that is just self-defeating. Jesus wants to show us what He can do through broken individuals and families. The Holy Spirit wasn’t just for those people 2,000 years ago. He can be just as active today, if only we would continue on the road to full reliance on Him.

That youth ministry I was once involved with? Well, I ended up moving, but was amazed to hear from a distance what happened. The youth pastor later started up an after-school mentoring program at the church for all those kids in the area who came from broken families. The church rallied behind it, and an out-of-the-box ministry was born. The church made great connections with the school and community, and the program became successful. The youth pastor from a small, rural church ended up becoming the national director for such a ministry within his denomination, helping other churches implement similar mentorship programs in their own contexts.

While that may be a great “feel-good” story, I don’t think that’s what it’s all about. Today, I still think about those youth I made friends with before things “took off.” That was just as much ministry as I’ve ever had in my life, and I think Jesus would agree with me, even if no one else who reads this does. That’s what happens when you look through the eyes of faith instead of what you can see with your eyes.

If we want to move past congregation-envy, we need to stop lusting after other churches and start falling in love with our Savior.